You Can’t Unsee This Family’s Hilarious And Awkward Annual Christmas Cards
We all have our holiday traditions—some families decorate the tree together, some go caroling, and others dress up in two-piece denim suits, bolo ties, pageant dresses, and Playboy chest tattoos to pose in the JCPenney photo-studio. That's exactly the kind of shenanigans the Bergerons get up to every year.
Since 2003, the family has been growing and taking hilariously cringe Christmas card photos as they do so. Brace yourself because there are mullets, wholesome Midwestern turtlenecks, probably a washboard hillbilly band, and a ton of American kitsch you won't be able to wash from your brain. But the holiday spirit? That's a constant.
It All Started Back In 2003 With Some Fake Hairplugs
Mike and Laura Bergeron kicked off what would be over a decade-long tradition with a solid 30, flirty, and thriving photoshoot. They were in their 30s here so they wanted to capture the spirit of pretending to always be so, even in your 40s.
So naturally, they reached for fake hair plugs, fake breasts, and a whole lot of cheetah. This was just the beginning of a long and amazing run of themed cards.
2004 Had A Shotgun Wedding
This year the Bergerons took on an American classic—our favorite trailer park Aunt and Uncle who just know how to make the perfect batch of Jiffy Pop over a campfire. They assured the photographer Laura wasn't actually pregnant, but I kind of doubted that was the highest concern.
If you pay close attention, you'll notice the gentleman's shirt says "Who Farted?" which is just the icing on the cake of this hilarious Christmas portrait.
2005 Had Turtlenecks And Wholesome Charm Come Out In Full Force
OK, this year the Bergerons went in the opposite direction of their previous holiday portrait. In 2005, these two were ready to host Christmas at their house this year and all they want you to bring is your cheerful self and some ready and able hands absolutely thirsting to pull apart Christmas crackers with them.
We love these people and we all know we're about ten years away from becoming them.
2006 Featured The Weird Kids On Your Street Growing Up
In 2006 the Bergerons aged backward and became the kids you used to pass by on the street who had a whole slew of rare food allergies and collected weird stamps of wildlife. You never really understood them, but they were a staple in everyone's life and you respected that.
She's even got headgear on in this photo! That's serious dedication to the artform. These two should win some sort of award for their masterpieces.
2007 Was "American Gothic" With Slightly More Xmas Decor
The Bergerons tapped into their photoshop skills for this one and it couldn't have turned out better. The Christmas lights on the farmhouse go well with the whole austere look of the scene
Grant Wood, the artist who painted "American Gothic," said his subjects were "the kind of people [he] fancied should live in that house." Wonder if he'd approve of the Bergerons in the place of the original models?
2008 Was A Case Of The "Merry Krishnas"
This is something that would only happen in the early 2000s. Whether this makes you uncomfortable or giddy, I think we can all laugh at the fact that Mike said they had to wander the mall, eat in the food court, and line up for the photo in these costumes.
We hope they chanted while they were touring the mall in these costumes. Why not go all out when you're decked out like this?
2009 Was A Very Miami Christmas
Here's another vestige of the early 2000s. I think it's safe to say they attended Catholic service this year. Though hopefully, after Spider and Lupia peeled their neck tattoos off. Check out her eyebrows! That's some serious attention to detail.
As much time as they spend planning these cards every year, they were up to something else in 2009. Spoiler alert: you'll see exactly what we mean on the next slide.
2010 Was A Boogie Wonderland With A Little Addition
Nothing says Saturday Night Fever quite like a little boogie baby of your own nine months later. All they're missing is a disco beat and a pair of acid-washed jeans that they did themselves that still smell like chemical bleach. Mike's combover is absolute perfection, as is Laura's frosted lipgloss.
As we'll see in later cards, their adorable child will get in on the themed action soon enough. It's kind of in their genes.
2011 Saw Hereditary Hairgrowth... Just On The Face Though
Nothing says family like passing down traits to your children. She's lucky to grow up with such a strong sense of family that all she has to do is look in the mirror to see.
In 2011, the theme was apparently "weird facial hair that makes us uncomfortable." And just like with every theme we've seen so far, they totally nailed it. If neither of them was a professional makeup artist when they started their tradition, they both pretty much are now.
2012 Had Some Hardcore Goth Christmas Spirit
It's looking like it's going to be a Jack White Christmas. This hardcore family decided that this year they'd take the Christmas card photo before the Macy's Day Black Parade to get it out of the way.
The lip piercing on Mom is an especially nice touch. It's the little details like this that make the Bergerons' Christmas cards stand out from all the other funny family cards out there.
2013 Was All About Keeping Fit, Having Fun, And Feeling Your Fonda Best
I don't know about you, but I'm getting inspired by the pure jazzercise energy radiating off this photo. The Bergerons captioned this photo "make your holidays sparkle" and honestly, I don't think they have a choice to do anything but.
We can't see them, but you know there are some major jazz hands going on with Mom and Dad. The little girl certainly nailed it. The baby is the only one who looks a little bit unsure about the whole thing.
In 2014 The Holidays Seemed To Drag On
Everyone tapped into their masculine and feminine sides this year for Christmas, and quite frankly, they're some darn good drag going on. I doubt people in the mall batted an eye at this one, not when Laura's looking like she's named "Tom" who's middle management at an insurance agency and a dependable family man all around.
We seriously need to learn how we can get on their card list every year.
2015 Was A White Trash Christmas In Jersey
Nothing says Jersey Christmas like cheap clothing that costs $500, sunglasses indoors, and a permanent scowl like you're trying to quietly intimidate the girl at Starbucks to make your latte right. She better do it quick too, you have a wax appointment at 3 pm.
This was also the year that Jersey Shore ended, meaning that the whole Jersey culture of "gym, tan, laundry" was already deeply infused into all of our brains.
2016: The Beverly Hillbillies Have Never Before Looked So Festive
These hillbillies are ready to celebrate the Lord's season and they're going to do it by heading out back to find the freshest looking roadside opossum for the Sunday roast.
We love that the little kid is holding a fish that he's just caught, and the daughter is dragging a doll around by the hair. All this photo needs is some real roadkill off to the side, but we understand why they might not want to put that in a Christmas card.
2017 Was A Sunburned Tropical Vacation
Ruby, Red, Scarlett, and Rose had a great time on their tropical vacation aside from the fact they only brought SPF 40 and not 85 like they needed to keep that fair skin from burning. But hey, if you get enough freckles it eventually looks like a tan.
Did they actually go to a tropical paradise this year, or is the whole thing staged? For some reason we really need to know this.
2018 Was The Year Of Toddlers, Tiaras, And Two-Piece Denim Suits
Today the Bergerons decided they were going home with the big win for their Christmas card because they're not a bunch of stinkin' losers. So they grabbed the fake tan, fake teeth, and a gallon of Mountain Dew and made the trip to the local toddler's beauty pageant at the Holiday Inn banquet room.
Mom really went all out with the cleavage this year, showing that she's a serious team player. Kudos to everyone for pulling off the pageant look!
The Power Family Was Not To Be Outdone
Not only are the Bergerons absolutely crushing it every year, but so are other people and families that are bringing their uncomfortable A-game to the Christmas card stage. So... meet the Power family. Their tradition started off with them looking like a foster family that'd make you wear a uniform in the house.
They all have the same unhappy expressions, pale skin, and crocheted vests over turtlenecks, making them look like Christmas hostages.
The Family That Lives Down The Road And Steals Your Garbage Cans
This year the Powers went for the look that was the reason you moved in 2003. This family kept you up at all hours with their screaming, garage band practice, and random squealing at midnight when Jesse McCartney dropped a new song. You know the one.
They absolutely nailed the theme, especially the dad in back wearing overalls and holding a pot-bellied pig. The pregnant smoker is also a nice touch.
"Honey, It's Called Glamour"
Can we just take a moment to recognize how absolutely flawlessly they pulled these transformations off? Their makeup, wigs, and outfits are completely on point, and honestly, I'm intimidated and feel like I need to step my beauty game up.
This is clearly not their first rodeo, as there's no way a newbie could apply makeup this professional looking. These ladies are pros and they're right to be proud of their artistry.
No, They Don't Want To Go To Red Lobster For Christmas Dinner
Merry Crustaceanmas from the Power family. Whatever lobster roll inspired this get-up must've been really good. I'm thoroughly impressed by the makeup and costumes, but I'm a little disappointed nobody brought the melted butter.
We're going to go out on a limb and say that they listen to the B-52's song "Rock Lobster" on repeat every day. If that's not their theme song, they're doing the whole lobster thing wrong.
If You Can't Tone It, Tan It
These contestants are vying for the number one spot in your heart and in their category. If you're not prepared to do the full wax, basically bathe yourself in paint, and put enough hairspray in so your head is a walking flammable hazard, then you're not really committed to the craft of beauty.
Which means that these guys are totally committed. We think. It's hard to tell what's real and what's been photoshopped here.
A Gloriously Cheesy Christmas
These two are doing Christmas absolutely right. From their tight, white turtlenecks to the maroon warmers and matching moccasins, I'm getting retro-luxe vibes and I have no doubt that's mulled wine they're serving with the fondue. How could it be anything else?
We would not mind hopping right into this scene and getting cozy with these people and that adorable cat (which is also sporting a turtleneck). Plus, it's been a while since we've had fondue! Sign us up for this.
The Norwegian Photography Store That Made Us Feel A Little Differently About Holiday Onesies
It's probably safe to say that this particular Christmas tree is one that catches your eye in the store but you're probably not bringing home. For obvious reasons... there's no tree skirt after all.
On one hand, we find this human tree to be kind of hilarious, and we really do admire their teamwork. On the other hand, we think we will have nightmares about this "tree" made of real live men.
The Mormon Coworker Who Got Tired Of Hearing Of People Asking If He Has Multiple Wives. So This Year...
This is a fabulous prank to pull on your friends, family, and coworkers if you really want to get them to stop asking you about your religion. All it takes is several female friends, 20 yards of denim and khaki fabric, and some time in the morning after churning the butter to take the photo.
We'd love to hear some of the reactions he got to this clever, but kind of snarky, card! Bet there were some good jokes.
Exactly How This Cat Probably Perceives Itself
This cat has been born and it wants you to know that. This is hilarious because it so accurately captures how every cat imagines itself in the world. It's understandable since they even have their own cathedrals—Petsmart.
Yes, this cat definitely thinks it's the world's savior, and its owner is more than happy to go along with the illusion. We wonder if they go out dressed like that for fun sometimes.
The Roommates Who Brought A Fantastic Card Into This World
These roommates delivered comedy and some Christmas cheer. Although, I'm not sure if that doctor looks totally capable of bringing that creature into the world. They might need to call someone a little older, or maybe a priest.
Is it traditional for roomies to send group Christmas cards? It's not something we've heard of before but we're all for it if they're as funny and clever as this one is!
He Lost An Arm And She Had A Double Mastectomy This Year...But They're Not Letting That Stop Them
What a year, but it's great to see that these two aren't letting life's circumstances get in the way of being their hilarious selves. Their friends and family were probably pretty surprised when they first saw this picture but likely got a pretty big laugh out of it.
This couple is obviously making the best of their situation and the fact that they can joke about everything is great. Hopefully, they kept the tags on the glove and the bra, though.
The Accrte Xms Crd
I mean, if this is how they're living their everyday lives then why change for the sake of the Christmas card? If they really wanted to be fully accurate then they would've brought their couch and blankets with them to the photoshoot.
Then again, do we need to see the whole family sitting around in their underwear or ripped up sweatpants, with their hair matted and fingers stained orange from Cheetos? No. We're glad they got cleaned up and dressed.
We Can All Relate To Being Emily For The Holidays
There's nothing worse than being Emily on the holidays—not because her life stinks, her life is great. But your relatives are always questioning when you're going to find yourself a partner. In those situations, I'm sure we all wish we were exempt from questioning.
We probably would have gone with "exceptionally annoyed that I have to participate in this dumb photoshoot" if that had been us. But "Emily" works alright, too.
Never Marry Someone Who's Good At Photoshop If You Want Nice Holiday Photos
This wife made the mistake of telling her husband she wanted a "nice" family portrait for the holidays. This is the family that greets you at the entrance to the underworld and definitely not the "nice" photo she wanted.
Whatever her holiday card goals were, we can guarantee that their friends and family were delighted with the way this photo turned out. This is a clever and hilarious (and yes, disturbing) card that they'll laugh at for years.
C'mon Man
The Heisman pose? Really? I always knew Seahawks fans were the worst but this is starting to get out of hand. The self-proclaimed "12th Man" strikes again with this Seahawks-themed family Christmas photo wherein Dad is striking the revered Heisman trophy pose. Yikes!
Did you know that every time Seattle uses the "12th Man" they have to pay Texas A&M? That school originated the moniker and owns the copyright to it.
Lap Dog
Once a momma's boy always a momma's boy, I guess. In his defense, this looks like a super comfortable setting. This couple looks like they don't have plans to do anything but sit by the fire and watch hours worth of classic Christmas specials.
That sounds like a great plan honestly. I know what I'm doing tonight. Lighting a fire, making some hot cocoa, and turning on The Santa Clause.
The Three Scrooges
Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, Moe, Curly and Shemp get all decked out in candy cane themed scarfs and don matching top hats to take the cringiest Christmas pic of all time. There really isn't much else to say about it other than that it shouldn't exist.
Sadly, it does exist, and we can't help but ask whose genius idea it was to take this disaster of a photo.
No Shame December
That right there is a very, very proud man. He owns a big dog, cradles a baby doll whenever he's feeling a bit paternal and spends his free time watching river monsters while sharpening his hunting knife.
He grew the handlebar stash in support of prostate cancer research during the month of November but when the calendar turned to December he said "what the hell" and kept the fire burning.
The Bearded Guy Is Definitely Gimli
There's nothing like a well-timed Lord of the Rings reference to get everyone in the Holiday spirit. If we can all agree that the bearded man is obviously Gimli that means the woman in the picture is Mira, the dog's name is Buddy and the cat's name must be Joe.
I kind of hope the pets are actually that large. It would be pretty amazing, however unlikely we know it is.
Accurate
Christmas is supposed to be a time when family comes together. A time when they sit at a table together where they share good food, enjoy good wine as well as each others company, free of distractions.
That means no Instagramming meals, snapping friends or tweeting about Christmas cake. It may not seem like it, but at least they're spending time together. And it made a hilarious card, so it's all good.
Tough Guys
Croquet mallets and Christmas vests are a winning combination. These two could run a clinic on how to look super badass in just about every situation imaginable. They've checked all the boxes: power poses, subtle flexing of the shoulders and biceps capped off with the intimidating staredown. It's all here people.
No one will ever create a better Christmas card than what you're looking at right now. It's just so beautiful.
How Many Daves Does It Take To Decorate A Christmas Tree?
It looks like Dave knows how to throw quite the tree lighting party. I spot 17 of them in the frame, including the Dave hiding under the Christmas tree and the one who's apparently stuck behind it. If you can't party with you — or 15 of you — how can anyone else, right?
This seriously took some amazing Photoshop skills. Even if you're not a big fan of the card itself, you have to be impressed with the time put into making it!
Christmas Is The G.O.A.T. – Literally
This Christmas card may be wildly cheesy (seriously, what thrift store did they pull those absurd Christmas sweaters from? What about that vest?), but the most perplexing part is the goat. How did a baby goat get there? Are they raising it as their child? We can only assume.
This photo really does raise far more questions than it does give answers. I guess we know what everyone will be talking about at the big holiday dinner party!
Everyone's In Their Christmas Best
Okay, so this dad actually gets some points for wearing a dress and stockings. Sometimes we all want to look pretty. What's deeply unsettling is the weird, plastic Santa saluting to nothing and the spray-painted backdrop which looks more like something from the Manson family homestead than a cheery photo studio.
At one point, this point may have seemed like a good idea. At another point it was clear it was not, but the family decided to commit anyway.
What Exactly Is Happening Here?
It's hard to tell exactly where to start with this one. There's no snow in sight and the family bizarrely draped tinsel and hung stockings on a cactus. Beyond that, why is the mother in a tennis outfit? Why is the kid wearing some kind of spandex wrestling-slash-ballet uniform? Why are dad's shorts so short? It truly was another time that I will just never understand.
Coming up: snakes! On a sled!
Mom And Dad, Please Stop Fighting For The Kids
This Christmas card may have attempted to be funny, but it's really just kind of sad. Mom's about to pull a Tiger Woods on her husband, while their baby, who clearly just stopped crying, clings to father, terrified. Dad never even saw it coming.
This kid is going to be traumatized for life. Just kidding of course. There's no way mom actually swung the golf club. That's what I'm telling myself, anyway.
Snakes Are Part Of The Family Too
We get it – you love your pets. Who doesn't? Seriously, though, who actually brings their snakes all the way to meet Santa. A dog, maybe. Maybe even a cat. But a snake and iguana?
Where does Santa actually draw the line and can you even legally bring those things into a mall. Are they registered as emotional support snakes? If not, I'm not sure they are actually allowed to be brought into the mall.
The Grinch
The girls and their mother are decidedly dorky, but it's kind of adorable to recreate the Whos of Whoville. What isn't cute is Dad in a bright green, full-body, spandex suit and creepy face paint.
Yes, he looks like the Grinch, but man, it could have been a whole lot less weird if he wore anything else. Did he have the green suit just laying around in storage, or did he actually buy the cheapest Grinch costume he could find?
#1 Gingerdad
This isn't awkward. It isn't awkward at all. These cookies may have been yummy, but this Photoshop job is anything but. They even managed to get the cat and the dog in there. One error: there's no way the person who allowed this photo to happen should be touting his status as #1 dad.
Did this really end up being the card that was sent to the extended family? Did they find it funny?
The Nativity Scene
Nativity scenes are a staple of Christmas, which is supposed to be a deeply religious holiday. These people took it one step too far when they decided to recreate that infamous night on their own Christmas card. There's just something really tacky about making your dog Jesus Christ. I get that some people love their dog just that much, but still...
If floating pets are your thing, you'll love the next page.
It's Raining Cats And Dogs
It's hard not to appreciate these people's commitment to Christmas, but the outfits are definitely a lot. Where do you even buy a puke-green poncho? Regardless, these people crossed the line when they floated their pet's head behind them as if they were deceased or a distant dream.
Why do so many people set up pictures like this with their pets? Do they really think it makes for a good holiday card?
Family Of Five Christmas Ornaments
Can't decide what to wear in your family Christmas photo? Why not dress up like giant Christmas ornaments. This is undoubtedly a flattering look for everyone. No, it's not all awkward and painful to look at. How much did they have to bribe their kids to get in on this one?
They probably didn't bride the kids at all. What happened was they told their kids that if they didn't dress up as ornaments then there would be no Christmas this year.
Honesty Is The Best Policy
Although this had the potential to be a nice Christmas card with such a lovely background, this family wanted to take the more honest route, similar to the family we saw earlier.
Instead of pretending that they're one big happy family like most cards, they're letting us truly know what they've been up to all year. And we respect that. Now excuse me while I check the messages on my phone.
That's Gangster, Yo!
Seeing this family's Christmas card really makes you wonder what the whole dynamic of their household is. Christmas morning surely has to be quite the event if this is what the lead up looks like.
Although it may be a bit cringy, you have to admit that it's clever as well and that "Ruff Daddy" is the star of the rap collective. That pooch is going to end up have a lucrative solo career.
